My 5 Best Life Lessons in 2022
With quotes to back them up
Lesson #1: A Reason to stop being anxious
About five months ago, I went through an experience that made me feel depressed for weeks, for the first time in my life. During this time, one negative thought that continued to cloud my mind was that I would never feel happy again. That I would never forget what had put me in that state of mind, that I would continue to feel sad, and the void feeling I had in my chest would always be there.
In simple terms, I was anxious of the future not getting better.
I felt that way because I was afraid the next day would feel just as sad as the current one. When this episode eventually ended, I wrote a quote in my diary to remind myself why I should never be anxious of the next day. It’s a bit long, but it’s worth it:
“Don’t struggle to be anxious about how you will tackle future issues. The you of tomorrow will always have sufficient strength to tackle tomorrow’s problems. Remember — the strength you have today, you didn’t have it yesterday. Tomorrow will still bring out a better you”.
Lesson #2: Get comfortable with making your own decisions
I have always seen myself as a funny adventurer. I don’t like social gatherings sometimes, but I love to be outside — in nature, at educational events, just outside. And I am also a nomad, somewhat. In four years post-graduation, I am living in my fourth apartment (not so common in Nigeria since we pay rent annually).
I recently moved to a new state for work, and this decision created a little controversy among some of my friends. I will say at least 80% of people I knew then insisted I shouldn’t move. Honestly, it didn’t seem like I had a solid plan, and it was a state with a higher cost of living and possibly elevated stress levels. Initially, I soaked in every opinion that came in. But at a point, I knew I had to halt them all and just decide.
I moved.
Was it stressful and different? Yes. Has it been more expensive living here? Hell yes. Was moving a good decision? Again, yes. Despite everything I have been through so far, I would not change a thing. It was my decision, and I embraced it.
For this lesson, I will leave you with the beautiful words of Ife, the CEO if Dang! Lifestyle Nigeria:
“The thing with getting advice from different people is that it drowns out the truth your soul is telling you”.
Lesson #3: Live with a sense of urgency
An annoying fact in the world today is that many of us take our lives for granted. We wake up with good health, a mind full of ideas, and all we can do is scroll through social media and be sad about the things we don’t have yet.
There should be a fervency and urgency in living, because you don’t have all the time in the world. Literally. And yes, this lesson is in line with this ‘what would you do if today was your last day on earth?’ ideology.
Attack this world with everything you have in you. Bring every idea you can to life, say and do everything you can. Become the best version of you possible, just because you’re alive. Because there won’t be a next time, and you don’t get to try again.
My quote on this one is from Robert Greene, in his book Mastery:
“The feeling that we have endless time to complete our work has an insidious and debilitating effect on our minds”.
Lesson #4: Remember, we all have a little bit of darkness
A naïve mindset is not a very good trait to have. I used to think that to not be naïve would make me a manipulative and conniving person. For me, it was either I remain oblivious to a lot of things, or I know to much and then use that knowledge to do bad things. I never felt there was a mid-point to this.
Today, I can gladly say that I know better, with a few ugly experiences as proof. I have learned, time and again, that there are many selfish people in the world, and that I should always question the motive of people. Always. You don’t have to think people are inherently bad, you should genuinely ask yourself why people do what they do. You can ask them if you need to, but don’t take their word for it. Look at their actions.
Also, learn to put a wedge between yourself and the emotions of others. Others have reasons for feeling what they feel or doing what they do. Never allow this to directly influence you. Stay on your path, read peoples actions before words, and don’t be unnecessarily swayed by their darkness (or even light), as the case may be.
My quote for this is from an anonymous source (a book I read but can’t remember the name):
“Always see people as they are, never through a naïve mindset. We all have a little bit of darkness”.
Lesson #5: Develop a knack for proactiveness
In March 2022, I began a new career journey in a large telco firm in Nigeria, and it has been a steep learning curve. Luckily, I found myself among teammates and superiors that exchange knowledge easily and want to see you grow. Among such many learning experiences, one that has stood out is on proactiveness.
Being proactive involves anticipating an event before it occurs and then doing something to put you on the winning side, should such event occur. You may even decide to do something that changes the tide of that event entirely, putting you in a leading position. My firm does this all the time, and I have learned to infuse this as a daily habit in my life.
Now, I eat healthy food not just because others do it but because I’m setting my body up for easy recovery if I fall sick. I’m learning skills that other people don’t see the need for, but they probably will in a few years. I make financial decisions not just based on what is happening now but on predicted economic trends for the future.
In summary, proactiveness is about changing the outcome of something to suit your preference. Now, the quote I have is business related, but it couldn’t have come in a more meaningful context. In a meeting with a chief management staff my organization, I picked this nugget. It is not a direct quote, but I summarized it based on an important lesson I learned from her that day:
“Businesses should learn to modify/shape customer behaviours, instead of just taking the behavior as it is. Know what triggers their behavior and adjust that trigger accordingly”.
I hope you write down at least one of these quotes, just to remember it on a rainy day.
Thanks for reading! Don’t forget to leave your thoughts in the comments section.
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